I just wanna be a girl!

Everyone has someone whom they idolize. To me, my inspiration is someone very close to me. Without them, I would never have been able to write all these blogs. No. It's not Taylor Swift. She might have given me content and material to write about, but there is someone else whom I idolize above all.  They don't realize that they are worth being idolized, no matter how many times I tell them. I say that they inspire me because they gave me the confidence to keep writing, no matter how many negative comments I received. They made sure I kept writing. Many of my posts are based on my experiences with them, things they told me, or things that I told them.  The best part about my source of inspiration is that they aren't a big famous celebrity. They are just another person who encourages me. If I had chosen a celebrity to idolize, they might have let me down someday. They might have changed their beliefs. I can trust that this won't happen with my inspiration. The best part i

Love is supposed to be legendary and epic. It should consume you and should give you what you want. That's what people believe at least. This is the most heartbreaking lyric from Fortnight. It tells me that people have a lot of trouble noticing red flags in people. All they can see is the good. While that is good in some cases, a person should know what's wrong with their partner. They should be able to see that some things aren't right.  Let's look at the title of the song... Fortnight... which means 2 weeks. I feel like this song is talking about the damage that can be done in 2 weeks. Some things can't be taken back. Some relationships can't be fixed. I feel like the line I'm talking about (I love you, it's ruining my life) means that something horrible happened in just 2 weeks. The singer feels like she can't go back to the relationship. She feels like the love she has is ruining her.  This song talks about the effects of short-lived love. It pro

This is another lyric from The Tortured Poet's Department The Anthology. It's from the song "Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus." The lyrics that I want to talk about read "If you wanna break my cold, cold heart just say, 'I loved you the way that you were.'"  These lines touched me. I feel like Taylor is telling us that her lover didn't like the way that she changed. She says that telling her that he loved the way that she was in the past is basically telling her that he doesn't love how she is now. I mean, she could have had her reasons for changing. She has the eyes of the world on her and wouldn't do things without thinking things through.  Yes. People change. If someone can't stick around to learn why, did they even love you to begin with? (I'm not commenting on Taylor's relationships here. I'm speaking in general.) I think that people have to be given the benefit of the doubt here. If some part of their character has c

This is a lyric from 'So Long, London' from The Tortured Poets Department. To me, this line just confirms my claims that no one can know the amount of sadness that a person has in them.  Thinking how much sad did you think I had Did you think I had in me? I feel like this shows us that people can project one emotion outwardly and that people usually have no idea what is going on in the person's mind. This is something that people do a lot these days. People are afraid of showing others their emotions. They are worried that they are going to be judged. As I have mentioned in a lot of my previous posts, this is something that has to change.  These lines also show us that even pop stars like Taylor herself aren't always happy. They also put on a show. This song is about her break-up with Joe Alwyn. When this happened, she was on her legendary Eras Tour. She was facing a break-up after more than 5 years. She could have taken some time for herself, but she didn't. She ju

"Just cry. It's okay," is something that people need to hear more often. People think that tears are a sign of seeking attention, being weak, or not being able to handle things on your own. In reality, I believe that tears are a sign that you have emotions. It means you are human.  People are so afraid of being judged that they just pretend that they are okay with whatever is thrown at them. They prefer to suffer alone while acting happy and cool in front of other people. People are scared that they will be ridiculed if they express their negative emotions.  I disagree with this and encourage people to express themselves. Bottling it all up is just going to hurt. Maybe even physically. It's just going to increase your anxiety and stress you out. Holding in all the hurt you are feeling will lead you to keep dwelling on the things causing negativity.  Crying is an emotional release for pent-up emotions. Even happiness. I think it's strange that tears of joy are enco

"My Life With the Walter Boys" was written by Ali Novak. It was one of my latest reads and I really enjoyed pursuing it.  It follows the life of New Yorker Jackie Howard, who just lost her entire family in a car accident. Her mother's best friend - Katherine Walter takes her home with her. There's just one problem, Katherine has 11 sons and one daughter, Parker, who doesn't really act like a girl. Katherine lives in a big house in Colorado.  Jackie has trouble settling into the family - naturally. For starters, she just lost her whole family. Jackie now has to start over in school while also having to deal with moving across the country. Not to mention, she is very prim, perfect, and proper. As you probably know, that would be hard to do in a house filled with boys. She has to deal with a house full of ruckus-creating country boys, who often forget what personal space and privacy means.  She finds herself caught between the affections of two of the Walter boys, Al

As you might have heard, Taylor Swift dropped her 11th album today. I was listening to the song 'I can do it with a broken heart' which inspired me to write this. This is about what I was feeling when I heard the song.  When I heard the first paragraph, I visualized a woman. She was a stereotypical blonde girl. Someone who was prom queen. Someone who was really popular and probably had everything she wanted. I pictured her as someone who took the love of my life away from me.  The chorus talks about a girl who can do it all. A girl who deals with a lot of problems but has to deal with them all on her own. She doesn't have anyone to turn to when she needs help. Someone tells the girl 'You gotta fake it till you make it.' I felt like that was a lesson to the girl, telling her not to share her sorrows with the world.  Someone was telling her to let her successes speak for her and that she didn't have to answer to criticism. She had to smile in public even when she

People these days don't feel like they are special to their loved ones. They feel like they can be replaced easily and that they aren't really worth much. Everyone deserves to feel special. Right? These are some things that I do to make my loved ones feel special and things that I have noticed them doing for me.  The first one is listening to them. I don't mean tolerating what they are saying, I mean really listening to them. You have to show them that what they have to say really matters to you. When they think that they are replaceable, reassure them, saying that they can't be replaced. Remind them that you care. Remember, it's not just about words. Prove it to them through your actions. Spare time for them, even if it means rearranging your schedule. Make it a point to include them in your life. Show them that they are important to you. (This can even be as simple as asking for their opinions.) Make them feel needed. Have deep meaningful conversations with them.

Close your eyes and imagine seeing your favorite person in front of you. This is the person you feel safest with. The person who knows you inside and out. Imagine them smiling at you and opening their arms wide. They nod at you and you break into a smile. You run to them and jump at just the right moment. You jump into their arms and they catch you. You wind your arms around their neck as they spin you around. You feel yourself melting into their embrace and sighing, all the worry inside you melting away.  Imagine sitting in the arms of someone you really love. Or sitting on their lap, their arms around you. Your head is resting on their shoulder or chest. You can feel their steady breathing. You can feel their hair tickling you. Imagine feeling time stop when you are there. Your breathing slows down and you calm down. The world slows down and your mind stops spinning.  That feels really good, doesn't it? One good hug is all you need. It can be the solution to all your problems. Wh

'This Is Me Trying' is - in my opinion - one of the most relatable songs in the Folklore album.  I really relate to what she is trying to tell her fans. It’s a song about vulnerability and insecurity. I feel like she wants everyone to know that everyone – including a famous singer like her – has insecurities. She wants us to acknowledge them. “I’ve been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they’re rusting” These show that people need time to adjust in a new situation or adjust to changes in life. I think the imagery with the wheels shows that even though a person was once at the top of their game, she can take some time to recover – without this being viewed as a fall from grace. “Pulled the car off the road to the lookout could’ve followed my fears all the way down” These lines tell us that it’s easy to give up. We all would have faced a time when we knew it would all be so much easier if we just gave up. But, it’s worth it to keep trying. “

Blind trust is so beautiful. It's literally putting your life into another person's hands and believing that they will take care of you. There are no strings attached. No doubts. No judgment. No fears. It's a sign of unconditional love. You trust that nothing will happen when you are with them. You can just close your eyes and jump off a (figurative) cliff and know that they will catch you.  You know that they have your back. You know that they won't judge you. Blind trust also promotes loyalty. I mean, think about it. You literally tell them everything about yourself. They know who you are, inside out. Would you do that if you didn't believe that the other person would be loyal? You trust that your secrets will be safe.  Blind trust also deepens a relationship. It leads to you being willing to share things with your friend or partner, which is important in any relationship. It encourages open communication. There aren't really many boundaries, just truth.  Pers

It is high time that we stopped judging one another. It has far-reaching effects and consequences that we don't stop to think about. People have to think twice before making assumptions about others. One simply does not have the right to judge others, to begin with. We shouldn't be so quick to judge without knowing the whole story. People don't take the time to understand the situation but are so quick to comment on things. I cannot emphasize that enough. We shouldn't judge without knowing the whole story. To put it into practice, before you judge someone, take a moment to think about what they would feel. Try putting yourself in their shoes in that situation. If you can't understand what they are doing or why they are doing what they're doing, it doesn't mean we have the authority to talk behind their back. It just means that there are things that they want to keep private. Imagine if you were in a similar situation. Would you want people to spread trash ab

Being vulnerable is often misunderstood as being weak. Vulnerability is a sign of feeling safe and secure. When we embrace vulnerability, other people see our true selves. Being yourself helps build better relationships.  People are scared to be vulnerable. They are worried that they will ridiculed or judged. Vulnerability is rare. People don't really show their true selves to others. People should know that it's okay to show they are vulnerable - after all, it is a sign of being human. Humans are supposed to have emotions and they are allowed to feel. Right?  The world is cruel. It misjudges vulnerability as a weakness. In my opinion, feeling secure enough to be vulnerable is actually a sign that you are emotionally and mentally strong. You don't have to be vulnerable in front of everyone, but at the same time, you can't keep your emotions to yourself. It's okay to be insecure sometimes. It's okay to be afraid of the scary possibilities of the future.  Somethin

Hanging out with 'the guys' is really amazing. Let me tell you about it.  For starters, they are not judgemental. You can tell them whatever you want to without having to worry about them looking at you differently. You don't have to worry that their perspective of you would change. Secondarily, you are very very safe with them. (I was hanging out with my brother and his friends. They pretty much adopted me.) This aspect is especially important if you are clumsy (like me). Third, they are really good listeners. Sometimes, girls are judgemental. They might pretend to care about you when you talk to them, but they might be glad that you are going through these problems.  (The next few things I want to mention might be trivial.) Fourth, you don't have to worry about food getting wasted. If you get full, they'll finish your food for you. If you don't like what you ordered, the same principles apply. They also make sure that you eat. (Read: you will be force-fed if y

Yes! Gender discrimination in clothes starts that early. Let's look, at an example: shorts that toddlers wear. Shorts for little girls are way shorter than shorts for little boys. You might say that boys are taller. But, until puberty, girls and boys are approximately the same height. What girls wear when they are older is their decision. They can choose whether they want to wear shorts at all. At a young age, shorts are convenient for children to play around. The skirts for toddlers are similar. Why does such a young child need clothes that are that short?   Another example is swimsuits. Why does a girl of that age have to wear a bikini? Why do her clothes have to have glaring cutouts? Do the manufacturers even remember that they are making clothes for children under the age of 5? It's hard to find clothes with decent cover. The kids wearing the clothes would be full of energy. They aren't going to be conscious of their clothes - like an older girl or woman would be.  I fe

One of the major complaints that girls or women give for jeans is the size of pockets. It's something that I face as well. The pockets of my jeans are tiny. They barely even fit my phone. The back pockets are slightly bigger, but they aren't really safe.  Recently, I heard about the reason for this. Or at least what people think is the reason. So, traditionally men were breadwinners in the family. It was believed that they would have more money in their wallet - which goes into their pocket. It was believed that women wouldn't really have much money. This was the sexist thought that led to tiny pockets on pants and no pockets on most dresses.  Another reason for this might be to boost the sales of purses. If women had spacious pockets, they wouldn't need handbags.  Truth be told, women have more things to carry - other than their wallets. Our pockets can't even fit a sanitary pad. A lot of women even carry makeup with them. They don't fit in their pockets and wo

Before diving into the story, let’s look at a little bit of Egyptian mythology. The first 4 deities we need to know for this story are Thoth, Ra, Geb, and Nut. Geb and Nut have a secret intimate relationship. This angers Ra, who lashes out in his rage. He curses Nut, forbidding her from having children on any of the 360 days of the year. Thoth, who was the god of wisdom, couldn’t see Nut in despair. He wanted to help her out. He gambled with the moon god Khonshu, in a game of dice. He ended up winning over and over again. He gambled for some of Khonshu’s moonlight. He was able to win one-seventieth of moonlight. Using this moonlight, Thoth created five extra days that he could add to the year. On these five days, Nut was allowed to give birth. She gave birth to five children, Osiris, Set, Horus, Isis, and Nephthys. She gave birth to one of them on each of the five days. If you remember Ra’s curse, he only mentioned 360 days. Since these 5 days were newly created, they didn’t count.

Harry Potter was one of the first series of novels I read. I started reading them when I was 8 years old and I couldn't get enough. I blazed through them and I found out that I absolutely loved them.  It was such a pleasure to watch the characters grow up, learn about life, and form new relationships. I was so lucky to lose myself in the world of Harry Potter. At first, I only loved the book for the story. I loved the idea of a magical world and a boy who learned to find his way in it. As I kept reading it as I grew up, I looked at it from different angles.  I loved Rowling's writing style. I loved her simple writing style. It was clear that she understood her intended audience well. She wrote in such a way that children could understand it without much confusion. She knew what children would expect from a book and met those expectations. She also understood her audience's attention span and made sure her story was fast-paced.  The world of Harry Potter also allowed me an e

Depression has become very common among today's youth and it is a serious problem that needs to be addressed. These days hearing the word depression has become part of daily life.  You might feel like recovery isn't worth it. You might feel like you don't have the strength needed to recover and that it would just be easier to give up. The first step you take could be something really small, like taking a walk or calling a friend. Recovery isn't easy, but it is in your control. You get to decide whether you want to recover or not. If you don't, you're going to end up paying the price.  You have to remember not to isolate yourself. You might not want company, but surrounding yourself with people you love makes you remember that life is worth living. It reminds you that there are people out there who do care about you. You might feel embarrassed to admit that you need help, but taking that step can prove to be a turning point. Isolation is just going to leave you a

I was inspired to write this post when I heard a few of my seniors talking about social anxiety and how socially anxious people are often mistaken for introverts. I realized that not many people really understand what social anxiety is. Social anxiety is an intense and persistent fear of being judged or watched by others. If it isn't dealt with, it can thwart a person's ability to form relationships. It can also keep them from initiating or maintaining a conversation. This anxiety can affect a person in all spheres of their life.  Social anxiety, which is actually mental, can also affect our body physically. People might feel nauseous in social situations. They might experience an increase in heartbeat, sweating, dizziness, blushing, stammering, or trembling.  People who have social anxiety dread how others think of them. They are very self-conscious and feel like they have a spotlight trained on them. They think that everyone is watching them, which makes them feel the need to

I was inspired to write this post by something that happened to me the previous day. I was traveling to Pallavaram by train. There were no seats, so my companions and I were standing. I was clinging on to my big brother’s arm. The train lurched to a stop at one of the stations. I was horrified to feel a strange touch on my lower back. I instantly realized it was an unfamiliar man’s touch. I recoiled instinctively. Unfortunately, I’m naturally clumsy. I fell into my friend’s arms. She asked me what happened. I was too disgusted to even speak coherently. This touch wasn’t accidental. The train was at a standstill and there was space behind me. He didn’t need to touch me to get off the train. Out of the corner of my eye, I could tell that he wasn’t a boy or even a young adult. He was a man older than my dad’s. That made the incident even more repulsive. I still have chills and shudders running up my body. This has been normalized in today’s society. A woman being touched by a stranger

In the immortal words of Olaf, love is putting someone else's needs before yours. In technical terms, love is a set of emotions and behaviour characterized by intimacy, passion, and commitment. It also includes care, closeness, protectiveness, attraction, affection, and trust.  “You want a love that consumes you. You want passion and adventure, and even a little danger…” said Damon Salvatore. Everyone deserves love, but most people think they don’t. Love is a necessity, not a desire. Unconditional love is something that everyone needs. A love without any expectations, without wanting you to change. Just simple and pure eternal love. One very important thing to remember is that love doesn't need to be romantic. It can be platonic as well. In my opinion, platonic love is the purest form of love. Love can mean different things to different people. Different people expect different things from their loved ones. In my opinion, love isn't a choice or decision. It's something

Princess treatment can mean different things to different people. To most people, it means receiving expensive gifts, getting all your demands fulfilled, and receiving special treatment. It might mean paying for everything, being taken out every day, being driven around everywhere, and including a lot of material things. Traditionally, princesses have been portrayed as very delicate people. They have a lot of people waiting on them hand and foot. All their demands are fulfilled immediately. No one dares question her orders. This is what most people think when they see the phrase 'princess treatment.'  In my opinion, princess treatment isn't materialistic. It's more personal. It's still derived from the treatment that a traditional princess receives, but it's more emotional and psychological. My definition of princess treatment is that people don't let you go to bed when you are upset. They make sure to check on you and make sure that you are emotionally

Recently, I received a nasty comment and I was unsure about how I was supposed to deal with it. The comment was on a public platform, which made things even worse. My first instinct was to retaliate. The comment was pretty personal and it was hurtful. I took a few deep breaths before making a decision. This is something that people should remember. Never make a decision when you are angry. I decided to be more mature than the person who posted the comment. If I retaliated – especially on such a public platform – how does that make me any better? All I would be doing is proving that they were right. I didn’t want to give anyone that satisfaction. I’m okay with negative criticism, but this was personal. I decided to delete the comment. When you are posting publicly, you have to be open to criticism. At the same time, you can’t let every comment get to you. You have to be the better person. You could just ignore the comment. Haters are going to hate. You don’t need to reply to the c

These days, dark romance has become very popular. It has created a fan base for itself and has a lot of avid readers. It features tension between the main characters and the characters are very complex and flawed. It usually features one character who is openly dark – i.e., he or she doesn’t try to hide it. The other character hides his or her dark influences until he or she meets the other character, who makes him or her open up. Dark romance has darker themes and is riddled with mature content. You should be aware of the content in the book before diving into it. There are morally grey characters and violent plots. The characters have faced a lot of traumatic incidents which made them ‘the way they are.’ When you try to write a dark romance, there are some things that you need to keep in mind. For starters, the characters have to be built well. You need to show off their different layers and complex motives. You can shine a light on their inner demons and personal struggles. You

A lot of people today have problems with setting up boundaries. They think that boundaries will make a person drift away or that it will spoil the relationship. In reality, boundaries are what define the relationship. People are afraid to say no and just go with the flow. This leads to internal conflict and might make the person feel unsafe.  It's okay to set different boundaries with different people, depending on how close you are to them. You can have different boundaries with your close friends than with your loved ones. If people can't accept the boundaries you set, it's best to distance yourself from them. You don't need to explain your motives. All that matters is that you feel emotionally and physically safe. They help build respect and trust.  People who are needy or co-dependent struggle with setting boundaries. They are scared that they will be left alone because of their boundaries or conditions. They are desperate for love, attention, and affection. They sa

A Court of Thorns and Roses is one of the most riveting book series I have read in a while. It's a series of five books namely, A Court of Thornes and Roses, A Court of Mist and Fury, A Court of Wings and Ruin, A Court of Frost and Starlight, and A Court of Silver Flames. This series was written by Sarah J Maas.  The saga begins when the protagonist, 19-year-old Feyre Acheron is kidnapped and taken to Prythian, i.e., the Faerie lands. She was kidnapped under the orders of one of the high lords, Tamlin, High Lord of the Spring Court. Tamlin was under a curse that dictated that he had 49 years to get a girl who hated Faeries to fall in love with him. No one was allowed to speak of the curse. By the end of the first book, Feyre proves her love for Tamlin by completing a set of harrowing trials. She also becomes one of the High Fae.  In the next book, Feyre moves on from Tamlin and falls in love with another High Lord, Rhysand, High Lord of the Winter Court. By the end of the book, Fey

  A problem that a lot of people have these days is embracing themselves. People are constantly seeking approval from others to make themselves feel good. This has to stop. People should stop looking to others to make themselves happy. Happiness should come from within. There’s always going to be someone who doesn’t like you. If you keep listening to everyone, all you’re going to end up doing is ruining your own peace of mind. No one is perfect. You just need to know and embrace your flaws and imperfections instead of denying them. Get to know yourself. Reflect on what makes you you. Make sure you understand what is important to you, and prioritize them. Remember to take care of yourself. Surround yourself with positive people. Good company can make all the difference. Pick people who celebrate your unique qualities instead of those who critique and judge you at every turn. Remember that everyone is different. Don’t compare yourself with others. Be kind to yourself and don’t put to

  The meaning of Taylor Swift's 'Love Story' is pretty straightforward, but I couldn't help analyzing it. It is one of my favourite songs and it is the one that made me fall in love with Taylor's music.  modern-day This song talks about a modern day Romeo and Juliet, two forbidden lovers, meeting in secret. The song starts with Taylor, adopting Juliet's character, reminiscing about the first time she saw her 'Romeo.' She tells us that they were young when they both met, just like in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, who were 16 and 13 when they met. She recalls that they met in the summer when she was leaning over the balcony.  She then refers to the Capulet's masked ball. She says she remembers the party where they met. She remembers the lights and the ball gowns. She says that 'Romeo' came up to her. She however didn't know that this boy would become her true love. She tells us that her father wanted them to stay away from each other.

  Before I start, I’d like to say that this is a very personal post, dedicated to a few very special individuals.  Anderlin, Sharan, Shane, and Mugunthan.  Technically they are my seniors, but they have become something more. These guys are the reason I made it through the year and have become irreplaceable brother figures to me. I may not call them ‘Anna,’ but the respect they earned from me is immeasurable. I still remember the first time I saw them. I was at an ethnic walk practice. It was only my second day there and I wasn’t very confident yet.  The four of them weren’t around on the first day of practice.  That’s when they arrived. They appeared, walking in a straight line. They looked so majestic and powerful that they scared me. They came to stand in front of me and I remember chills running down my spine. None of them were laughing at the moment (you’re not allowed to laugh or smile during an ethnic walk.) I was so intimidated by them. There aren’t words to describe how I fe